Halloween

Lewis as a vampire
Today is halloween and Lewis dressed as a vampire i think he looks pretty cool.

Ashleys 30 week baby belly

Ashley baby belly again with Nanna in the background

Ashleys 30 week baby belly

Ashley is 30weeks pregnant now the time is just wizzing by, only got ten weeks to go but we think she might have to have another c-section going off her other pregnancy,


I also have to say here that the health care for pregnant women in this country stinks it seems to have gone back to the years where you see a midwife at the begining then they couldnt care less until you are almost ready to give birth, she is having a little trouble and when she rang the midwife this morning all she said was well you see Doctor B. in a couple of weeks so bring it up with her WTF, she rang because she believes she had reason to ring, last week she had a letter telling her to get in touch with the midwife as the results of some blood she had had to give was reading odd now wouldnt you think that someone would be there to see her when she rang to see what the blood results are all about?


I am going with her on the 14th November to see Doctor B so i will be bringing this up with her i mean for Gods sakes she almost died the day after she gave birth to Lewis they had to call the crash team her heart stopped, so i would have thought she would have been given priority this time around,


Jayne not very happy about this :<(

New carpet

My carpet is laid and everything is back in its place thankgoodness, i was getting really stressed out by the whole thing of not having carpet down and everywhere being a mess again, went to bed with headache last night and woke with headache:(

Kelly has been again this morning i like her very much told her all about the other T i had and she said i should of complained about her but she understood that i am not a complainer and doesnt like to stair up trouble, I am just so grateful to God that Kelly is not like that and seems a really genuine person here to help me. I wont be seeing her next week as she is going on holiday but i will see her on the 7th November,

Dh is on call tonight so i am on my own, i am going to try and chill a little if i can, maybe wrap the presents i got for dh for Christmas i keep forgetting the name tags though i just hope i can remember what is for whom LoL.

No carpet

Its been taken up this morning so now i havent got one i have to wait four days till my new one is delivered and fitted, omg its so cold here my toes are like ice and i have the central heating on,
I think i will go upstairs and watch some telly as the one in the living room is disconected and i cant even get in the conservatory as its full of furniture :D

Messing about

With the colours of this blog and i lost my labels for the posts how stupid am i ? i dont know how to get them back if anyone knows please tell me:>/

Kelly

My new T is called Kelly and i think i like her, she was here at my home for almost two hours she seemed like she had time for me which was nice, we talked about what triggered me in the first place so i told her what i thought and she agreed, anyway bottom line is she seems a really nice person, i will be seeing her next friday at 10.30am she thinks it best if we see each other once a week to start with then reveiwing it later she said she will see me as often or as little as i want.

So i am happy about that.

Tattoo

I want a tattoo on the bottom of my back, lillies with the words
Anyone who says sunshine brings happiness
Has never danced in the rain.
and that is all I have to say today,

Outreach worker

Or Therapist as they were once called rang me today her name is Kelly and shes coming to do a home visit on friday morning at 10.30am hope we like each other now i am worried and anxious about that now, Geesh when will it ever end?

Pictures

Ashley 27weeks and four days pregnant
Stuart and Lewis yesterday

Of Stuart Ashleys SO and Lewis from yesterday and a new pic of Ashleys baby belly shes already 27 weeks and i think four days now time is just flying past,

The Doctor

My dh has been on the phone pratically all afternoon with the mental health department anyway long story short they are letting me have the doctor i want with a care co-ordinator from our town, I am still anxious about this because i am afraid that they will say they got it wrong and give me the doctor i dont really want,
Anyway i just want to say thanks dh for having my back in all of this i dont know what i would do without him, hes my absolute rock.

Today

I just wrote a long blog here and damnwell lost it i cant believe that happened, so here goes again........

Well today i recieved a phone call from a lady at the crisis team apparently when someone has been inpatient they recieve a follow up call to see how they settled in at home i am doing okay just very anxious about which pdoc i will be seeing in the future,
she said she would make enquiries when she got back to the car, anyway she rang me about an hour or so later she got back to me and said they were having a meeting (both teams) tomorrow the only trouble is the pdoc that i want is going on leave tomorrow so probably wont be at the meeting and wont be able to put my case forward, he said when i was in hospital last week that he would have no problem about being my pdoc the only thing is i have to get me a cpn (outreach worker) i think they are called nowadays, anyway i am very anxious about all this and about them appointing me the pdoc that i dont want whatever they decide i will have to go with it, if anyone is reading this blog please pray that i get the doctor that i want and feel comfortable with.

Home again

I am finally home i feel much better and more like my normal self its a relief not to have the racing thoughts going round and round the suicidal thoughts flitting through my head,
I am glad to be home and Rodney said hes happy that i am home even the dog is happy LoL hes forever following me and everytime i sit down hes on my lap.

home

For the weekend i have been to hospital to get my meds sorted out they let me home for the weekend i have to go back on sunday evening, came home at lunch time today i am feeling a little overwhelmed but i am sure tomorrow i will feel better,
Just hope the med change works, still dont know who the hell my pdoc is going to be or whats happening, suppose i will just have to wait and see till next monday or tuesday,